Family

September 17, 2012

For Moms Who Yell Over Spilled Milk

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Written by: Shari
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I’ve heard comments from moms who feel AWFUL that they yell at their children.

And I remember that feeling; although I used to raise my voice from time to time — I don’t anymore.

It’s not that I’m perfect — I’m just old.

And time changes your perspective, and gives you a bit of maturity and experience in the process. But that doesn’t help in the days when a busy mom is frazzled and worn out, and has been held hostage by toddlers and babies for two weeks straight.

In those days, while my kids let out their emotions by wailing, I let mine out by raising my voice — or interminable lecturing. . .

The main thing that used to put me over the edge was spilled milk.

There’s No Use Crying Over Spilled Milk

Or so my grandma used to day.

I think the reason I hate spilled milk so much,  is because it is such an easily avoidable annoyance.

Spilled milk is usually the result of someone ignoring basic instruction like:

Don’t reach across the table.

Don’t set your cup so close to the edge.

Your glass belongs above your plate. . . just above the knife. . .

Watch what you are DOING.

DON’T WRESTLE at the table.

DON’T STAND ON THE TABLE!

Watch the cup–

AGHHHHHHH!

Just basic observance of common etiquette will generally eliminate spilled milk. . . but try explaining that to a three-year-old.

Over the years I’ve come to realize that a cup brim full of milk splattered across the table, pooling into ponds, dribbling between the table joints, rivulets round the legs is not a diabolical plot of a toddler to disrupt my schedule.

I’ve developed a few strategies, and learned not to fill a cup to the brim — and lids are great — go sippy cups!

Although it’s probably not listed on the actuary charts, I’m sure there is a mathematical equation to predict how many glasses of milk per child will be spilled in our home. Just expect it. They could also predict that the number of spills is directly correlated to the busy-ness of our day.

I’ve learned to plan some cushion into my day– for spills.

The mess is not punitive payback for making them eat their veggies — well, maybe that does add into the equation to some degree–but kids just make messes.

No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t plan for perfection, and mistakes and accidents occurred when I least expected it. And perfection was not my guaranteed reward for proper planning. I’ve learned better. Sometime in the next few days, something like spilled milk, an unexpected disruption to my schedule, is going to happen, and I’m planning right now how I’m going to mop it up.

Truthfully, I can’t wait for some more spilled milk from chubby little toddler hands grabbing that cup of frothy chilled milk – and dribbles on the chin, and spatters on the table from dunking cookies. I’m anticipating with delight spilled milk by grandbabies and great grandbabies yet unborn.

Perspective changes everything. If you’ve yelled at your children lately, don’t take it too hard. It happens, just like spilled milk — that unexpected capsizing, that gush of guilt, that dribbling of destructive words, rivulets of rage.

Mop it up as best you can — with hugs and kisses and repentance and forgiveness. You’ll mature just like your children will. The spillings will become more rare, and the yellings will fade away — and you’ll be old — ahem — mature enough to appreciate spilled milk someday!

 



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About the Author

Shari
Shari Popejoy, wife of twenty-eight years, mother of three, founder of a local co-op for hundreds of homeschool children, author of seven books, and creator of Won Without Words (a blog of encouragement for wives) lives in the quiet country of the Ozarks where she enjoys writing surrounded by nature (and her children, of course). She is currently completing Volume V of the Livingstone Library, an adventure series for 'smart' kids, which features characters with character, and underlying allegorical spiritual truths. She enjoys high places and the road less traveled, and moments when all is well, and peace permeates like a fragrance. . .oh, and chocolate, fresh fruit and veggies, and early morning sunrises. Read her blog at WonWithoutWords.com.




 
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One Comment


  1. Tara

    Thank you for this! I do have little outbursts about the silliest things. And I feel awful as you say. I’m trying to learn to offer myself grace and offer my little ones grace. Which means we are going to make mistakes. Otherwise there’d be no need for grace. Thanks for the perspective of a more mature mom to remind me again that this season will pass.



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